The Positive Diary #13 – Warning signs

25th November 2018 – I am an expert especially in one thing and that is taking too much on. Well, I would say comparing with others, I don’t take on that much but maybe that is the problem, that we tend to compare ourselves with others and then make our decisions based on these comparisons. While all we ought to do is just ask ourselves: is this really good for me? Am I going to make it through with my health and sanity left? I usually forget to ask and then, in the middle of a semester, I usually end up thinking about how I will manage to survive until it ends. I’m no good at managing stress, I have to admit.

 

When I was finishing my bachelor’s degree, I somehow got this job offer I couldn’t dismiss so easily. It was a position of an editor in one of the most renown Czech magazine for kids. As my first job ever, I couldn’t wish for anything better. So, I accepted it. First two months, it was a joyful ride – I didn’t have many classes at school, I was content with my co-workers and I felt important. I felt how my self-confidence is growing, slowly. It was a dream. But then, first warning signs started to appear.

 

My strong immunity went to zero and I was sick all the time. With that, I ceased to enjoy my work, I ceased to enjoy my classes, my marriage, my life – everything was consumed by the dullness of everyday stress. I stopped managing my time schedule, I didn’t have time to do my home works properly and neither to do the job assignments. I remember this dark and cold emptiness from that time which I was trying to fill with the music of one of my most favorite bands, All Time Low. I decided to ignore all the warning signs until the point when there was a huge chance, I wouldn’t finish my bachelor thesis on time. Only then, I decided to execute the plan I had already dreamt of for several months and I finally quit. It has been the roughest few months in my modern history.

 

Since that time, I’ve always tried to avoid myself from getting into such situations again. And the reason for that is not that I would like to spoil myself but rather the fact that it was not worth the effort. We basically live in the age when workaholism is considered to be trendy and the one who is not as obsessed with gaining power and money as the rest of a society is usually considered to be weak, even lazy. I don’t think these people, and me among them, are lazy. We just value our lives more than money, we value our time more than showing off with a new super-fast car or super-expensive watches. When you think about it in this perspective, who is the fool in this story now? 🙂

 

So, today I want to express my gratitude for being able to recognize and also being able to respond to those warning signs I have been experiencing for some time now. Based on my old experience, I have decided to slow down a little bit. And I have to admit that during the last couple of days, much of my happiness and calmness has returned.

 

I believe these are the crucial things in one’s life that are worth the extra effort. Just find yourself time to rest properly, to feed your body with nutritious food, to exercise the body with fav YT yoga video and to calm your mind with the guided meditation that always brings you the tears of joy. With that, everything else will surrender and you will be able to see the meaning of your life again.

Think of it tomorrow, as the new week begins.

 

With love

Wicked And Clever

Šárka

 

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